Dealing With the Bullying

It has happened to you.

It has happened to me.

It's happened to anyone you see who has completed schooling in a school (as in, not home- schooled).

And as much as we'd like to say that we got out of it like a boss with zero tears shed, we all know the truth.

Guy or girl, we've all shed tears over bullying.

Age 3 or age 17, we've all seen bullying.

It could have started off as a small comment among close friends at the age of three, that became a full fledged hate war at the age of sixteen.

And believe it or not, they make interesting story- lines for well, stories, movies, etc etc.

It could have started because you couldn't catch up in studies with the rest of the class.

It could have started because you sucked, big time, at sports.

It could have started because you still acted like a kid at the age of 14 (which is if you ask me, still the age of a kid. One can never fully become an adult.).

It could have started because you looked different than the others, and I mean it color wise, body wise, mind wise, clothing wise, etc etc.

It could have started because you behaved horribly to a group of people, who then decided to make your life living hell as revenge (though this is most likely to be seen in overly dramatized and traumatizing teenage movies, one of the millions that are available in YouTube. Not that I saw any of them, no.)

Ok, you got me, I did watch one of those movies which did get me thinking about this.

But I just didn't tell you that, so CTRL+A+DEL.

I have faced bullying at the tender age of 10/11/12. 

I'd like to say that the three years were a learning curve that led me to understand more about myself.

But the truth is, I was a full time cry baby who once cried because in 2012, some idiot made up a rumor that the world was going to get destroyed.

And no, that didn't happen because here I am in 2016 talking so boldly.

At that age when everyone was so naturally awkward around each other, the best escape route was bullying.

And the poor old victims, ie. myself, came out wiser, braver and ultimately better.

No offense to the others though.

How did I come out?

Well, it was fairly simple. 

I stood up for myself, made weird, funny faces at them and yes, I just spoke out.

And it stopped, it did.

If anyone were to look at me now, they can't believe that this blabbering, bumbling, babbling baboon was actually a very quiet person who rarely opened her mouth outside her house.

That's the whole thing about bullying.

It quiets you down and makes you insecure and lose your self esteem.

It tests your patience.

It goes on and on.

And trust me, even though people might say that being quiet is the best way to handle it, it's all smooth sailing unless one of the bullies crosses the line too much.

And then it's a full on fight.

And it's not pleasant to look at.

Standing up for yourself is the best thing one can do.

Believe in yourself and if what they say gets to you, just turn around, make weird faces at them in front of them and behind them and the things they say become a huge colossal joke instead of an insult.

I should know. 

Once my mother 'innocently' commented that my face was one day going to get permanently set in one of the many weird faces I have perfected till date.

It never fails to creep me out, especially after I read this Enid Blyton short story about the same.

So yeah, perfect that nonsensical look, turn to them, give them the weirdest face you can muster and they'll be so weirded out that they won't trouble you again.

And yeah, if that doesn't work, just turn around and don't care what they say.

Few years from now, you could be a CEO and they could be selling fries at McDonald's.

You never know.

Well, maybe I've become a bad influence...

Nah, what I say is a one hundred percent working formula to deal with bullying.

Just be yourself, be comfortable and if they cross the line, go fight them back.

Otherwise just forget them.

Dogs bark at the sun, but does the sun bark back at the dogs? (Weird analogy, I know)

Be the sun, immortal, bright and a never ending source of energy.

Let the dogs come and go. their barking isn't going to stop you from shining.

Dealing with bullying is much easier than you'd expect.

Get yourself a person who'd listen, patiently, to your ranting.

In my case, I was extremely lucky to have my mom and grandma.

Go to that person with whatever that troubles you.

Yeah, they can't solve your problems for you, that's for you to figure out on your own.

But they can help you get a clearer mind and any weight is easier to bear if two people carry it.

Go put on that killer smile and have your weird face ready at hand.

Don't let their words and action disturb you, instead have a good laugh at it.

So yeah, enjoy life!!

Oh yeah, before I end this post.
I was extremely surprised and glad today when I saw that this blog has crossed 1000 page views.
You might think that it's not that much, but it means the world to me.
Thank you, each and every one of you for this huge huge honor.
I'm really grateful :).

Till later amigos.

PS: You might have wondered why I say amigos after almost every post...

I am a huge fan of Dora The Explorer. I can't help it. When I grew old enough to stop watching it, my brother was the age of watching it. So there. I am quite sheepish about it, but cartoons are the only good thing to have ever come on TV. That's a fact.

Learning to Say Good Bye

It's funny now that I see it, that my 13th post is the one I'm writing after my biggest test.
I'm currently on a train, going to my grandma's house to hopefully enjoy my last few days of freedom.
Oh wait, results are yet to come...

How to deal with the exam pressure?
Buddy, if I had known that myself, I wouldn't have spent a better part of my available studying time crying to my mom over FaceTime. [I've mentally resolved myself that it's not going to happen ever again]

But, I have learnt one thing, how to say goodbye.

Goodbye, eleventh standard! (Good Riddance!)
Goodbye, getting full marks in any subject! (Boohoo! Nah, not really)
Goodbye, free days because believe it or not, I am in twelfth now.
La Twelfth, the big year, the year where it's all work and no play (apparently so)...
Goodbye, to all the worries that troubled me this past one year.
The coming year is new, untested and exciting.

It's very difficult to say goodbye to the good things in life.
We get attached to them and when it's time to say bye, we end up getting hurt.
We are all basically creatures of habit.
Testing the unknown simultaneously excites and terrifies us.
And we try our level best to keep things under our control, and when it doesn't happen that way, it depresses us and pushes us to tears that sometimes are just not worth shedding.

This comes after reading so much about this year's really tough CBSE Mathematics paper.
When a person puts in so much work only for it to go waste, it is something completely heartbreaking and when it's your future that's getting the brunt of the impact, it is downright depressing and demotivating.

I can't claim to have had previous experience in these kind of issues.
I'm no expert, I am yet to go through all that emotional trauma (and a small selfish part of me hopes that I never ever go through anything traumatic, ever in my life).

But one thing that I know is really important to go through with life.
Learning to say goodbye.
Learning to say goodbye to all the previous bad experiences.
Learning to say goodbye to few people.
Learning to say goodbye to dreams and aspirations that went bad.
And learning to use that goodbye as a crutch to pull yourself up.

Really, saying goodbye is so many things at the same time.
Confusing, traumatic, tough, easy, complicated, troubling, bad, good, inspiring and a lot more.
But, you will be much better off without the weight of your previous mistakes on your shoulders.
Only, if you get the courage to say good bye.

Throw them out of the window.
Bid them a hearty goodbye.
Look at what to do next.
Get to the next step.

All your mistakes might define you now, but once you've rubbed your slate clean, what you write again is what defines you.
Learn from the mistakes, but don't carry them forward.
Some things are meant to be forgotten and are better when left behind.
Learn to say goodbye.

I know this one is completely not my usual way of writing.
But the amount of suicide comments, etc etc really triggered something in me.

This one is for all those students out there, who feel like life has ended because of a few bad experiences.

This is just a temporary turbulence in your flight.
Don't let it crash your plane.
There are so many things out there in the world.
Your marks don't define you.
And when you've had a really bad day, think of those who could've had worse.

If you would die just for marks, what about all those people in warring countries who fight to live even when their whole country wants them to die?
This isn't the end of the road.
There's still so much to do, to live, to see, to enjoy and appreciate.

I hope you understand this.
Don't let anything and anybody drive you to destroy yourself.
It'll destroy not only you, but the whole spirit of your family, friends and even the country.

I don't know what else to say, I really don't.